life.

hi bloggie..
how are you? hope you doing fine..
don't be like your owner.. *sigh*

okay.. referring to the title..
L.I.F.E......
do you know what it means?
to be honest, me myself didn't know how to explain..
but i know for sure.. it's unfair, kinda happy and painful..
well, i think it's only for me..
to others, enjoy your life and learn how to appreciate it.. :)

ya Allah.. please hear me..
i know i'm wrong.. i only look for you in my hardness time..
it's my biggest fault in life..
i didn't realized.. every happiness that i've been through.. it's all because of YOU..
all my life.. since i was just a kid, i never had a wonderful life..
in family aspects, economy, and not to mention, relationships..
it's okay.. i know there's hikmah behind it..
but i wonder why.. until now.. i still 'tidak sedar'..
i rarely think about You.. i'm being selfish..
i forgot Your existence..
ya Allah.. please give me chance..
give me hidayah.. i badly need it..
lead me to a better way..
forgive all my sins..
insyaAllah.. i will learn to be a better person..
i need Your lead ya Allah..

the reason i don't feel better now is the same old things..
who knew me, they will surely can catch what i'm trying to say..
ya Allah.. seriously.. i need someone to lean on now..
not just someone.. it's THAT someone..
i need him.. i had a feeling, only him can understand me..
why are you so far away? i'm in this kind of situation, seriously i need you..
how i wish this year will end much faster..
if needed, i will run away from here.. i won't continue this pre-u test..
i can't focus! dammit..
it'll be good if you're here.. to encourage me.. T^T
i guess i'll have to wait a lil more time.. *sigh*

that's all for today..
i'm moody..